I Raise My Kids to Value Kindness, Not Dogma

What I care most about teaching my children isn’t blind obedience to rules or rigid beliefs. It’s kindness. Real, everyday kindness. The kind that shows up in how they treat a classmate who’s struggling, how they speak to someone different from them, how they treat themselves when they make a mistake.

Dogma demands conformity. It says, “This is the only way,” even when that way causes harm. But kindness asks, “Is this fair? Is this compassionate? Does this help?” Kindness is alive. It listens. It adapts. It sees the person in front of you, not just the rule on the page.

I don’t want my children to grow up thinking they need to follow a script to be good people. I want them to learn to think for themselves, feel deeply, and choose actions rooted in care. I want them to notice when someone is left out and include them. To admit when they’re wrong and make it right. To ask questions instead of judging. To be gentle with people who are hurting—even when the world tells them not to be.

Kindness doesn’t need a label. It’s not reserved for the religious or the righteous. It’s human. And it’s powerful.

So no, I’m not raising my kids to fit a mold. I’m raising them to be free. Free to think. Free to love. Free to grow into people who know that what matters most isn’t the rules they follow—it’s the hearts they touch.

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