Proverbs 18:22 (NLT) says, “The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favour from the Lord.”
I’ve been reflecting on this verse for a while, and I’ve realised something important. The man who finds a wife finds a good thing. There’s a reason why your wife is a good thing in your eyes. She doesn’t have to be a treasure to everyone else. She just needs to be a treasure to you because you are the one who found her. If she’s treasured by everyone, it might bring some challenges. But ideally, a wife should be a good thing to her husband, not necessarily to everyone else. For example, you might not like your friend’s wife, but that’s okay. To him, she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to him, and that’s what matters.
The verse goes on to say that a man who finds a wife receives favour from the Lord. If you observe godly marriages, you’ll see that they are blessed. Their lives are good, their businesses are flourishing, and their children are well. That’s because God has shown favour to the man, and all that he has, simply because he found a wife.
On the other hand, there are men who are not looking for a wife, but for fleeting pleasures. They seek temporary moments of happiness through flings and relationships that hold no depth. The Bible warns that these men will find themselves at the door of the immoral woman (Proverbs 5:3-5, NLT: “For the lips of an immoral woman are as sweet as honey, and her mouth is smoother than oil. But in the end she is as bitter as poison, as dangerous as a double-edged sword. Her feet go down to death; her steps lead straight to the grave”). Their wandering hearts, chasing after these moments of pleasure, lead them only to destruction.
May God deliver us from the spirit of dissatisfaction and give us the wisdom to cherish what we already have. God never gives a man a finished product. A wife is an unfinished treasure, and it is up to the man to mould her, cherish her, and present her to himself, just as Christ does with the Church (Ephesians 5:25-27, NLT). Unfortunately, many men today are only chasing after moments of pleasure, and once that initial light dims, they run to find another.
May the Lord deliver us from these fleeting desires that can never truly satisfy. Pursuing things of the flesh, of the world, will always lead to death. I once heard that the devil never shares his kingdom with anyone, which is why following the desires of the flesh will always leave us empty and lead us down a path of destruction.
For those men who already have wives, may the Lord continue to bless your unions. For those who are looking for wives, I love this saying: Drown yourself or hide yourself in Jesus, so that the man/woman who wants you will need to find Jesus to be able to find you. Marriage is an institution created by God, and you need God to survive a marriage. Without Jesus at the centre, your marriage will be shaken. But with God in the midst of your marriage, it becomes the triple chord that cannot be easily broken, as mentioned in Ecclesiastes 4:12 (NLT): “A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.”
Lastly, pray that God will bless you with a wife and that His favour will follow you throughout your life. And remember, if you mistreat your wife, your prayers will be hindered. 1 Peter 3:7 (NLT) says, “In the same way, you husbands must give honour to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.”
So if you feel like your prayers aren’t being answered, take a moment to reflect and see if you’ve mistreated your wife in any way. It could be the very reason why your prayers are being blocked.
That’s it for today. Tomorrow, we’ll talk about “back-to-back” in marriage.